Listen with ears, eyes, and heart

How often do you really listen to someone?
Or do you think about what you’ll say next while they’re talking?
Listening with your ears, yes… but not with your eyes or your heart?

I’m a therapist.
My clients are anxious, depressed, and traumatized.
Some are afraid of meeting new people… scared of going to school…
Some can’t sleep.
When life gets tough, some even think about ending their lives.

A few months ago, a 12-year-old girl came with her mom.  Let’s call her Grace.
Grace looked at me… then down… quiet… nervous.
Imagine being 12, sitting with a stranger who’s asking about your problems.

Too many words.  Too many questions.  Too much noise.
It’s like being attacked by bagpipes, a marching band, and a karaoke machine… all at once.

For Grace, silence felt safe.
For some people, silence feels awkward.
For others, silence is exactly what they need.

So, pause… wait… breathe.
Sometimes the most supportive thing you can say is… nothing.

I remember a few years ago, trainers Janet Childs and Sue O’Reilly Cronin teaching me something powerful:
Did you hear what I didn’t say?

In chaos, people can’t process words.  Their brains spin.  They either freeze or shut down.
They hear your tone, see your face, feel your gestures….long before your words make sense.
When the nervous system calms down, words finally land.

Whether in crisis or calm, ask yourself:
Are you really using your ears and eyes to understand the other person?
Is your heart open?  Are you fully present?

Listening is a big deal in a world that prizes talking so much.
Step back.  Be present.  Pay attention.
Because everyone has little jewels to share.
If we all listened with ears, eyes, and heart, the world would be a better place.